The next part of disappointment that I have been chewing on is this:  we’re so used to “surrendering everything to God,” that we often take the promises of God and stop believing that He is going to fulfill them because somewhere along the line, we hoped, and it didn’t happen and so we “surrendered” it —right into unbelief.

It’s like this:  we get a word or a promise from God.  Something we’re super excited for.  For me it was the ministry God had before me.  Three years ago I got a word that it would happen around Thanksgiving time.  Well, let me tell you, that Thanksgiving three years ago was the least thankful givings I may have ever had.  So anyway, I “surrendered” my dream, my promise, my desire to the Lord and told Him, “fine, Lord, I’ll just stay in my job for the rest of my life, and I won’t think about the ministry thing again!”  So I tried and I tried to forget about this dream, but it haunted me.  I was believing for revival in my workplace (still am), and trying to surrender this dream and give it back to God that I might get His desire for my life.  There was just this one problem:  The very promise I was working so hard to give up, was the very one He was wanting to give to me!

See, we get promises from God, that He wants us to joyfully and excitedly expect to be fulfilled.  Then, when they don’t come how and when we thought they should, we get disappointed and beat ourselves up for ever wanting anything from God other than His Presence, and we try to surrender ourselves right back into holiness.  Only it’s not holiness that we’re surrendering into—- it’s stupidity!  Here’s why:  God gave us promises to be excited about, promises that He fully intends to fulfill.  But because we are so afraid of being disappointed, we stop believing Him, just to protect ourselves from being let down again.  We actually slide into unbelief because of our fear of disappointment.

What God would have us do instead, is to draw near to Him (see Pt. 1), and taste and see that He is good.  When we have tasted of His goodness, faith arises once more for the promises that have been given to us.  See, when God gives a promise, He wants us to excitedly believe for it, and watch for it, celebrating its arrival even before we have it.  When disappointment comes, we are to press into Him, and through the disappointment, to maintain and actually grow in faith of the promise that just days ago we were ready to abandon!  It is not God’s desire that we would abandon His promises for our lives because we’ve been disappointed by their (in our esteem) untimely arrival!  It is His desire that we would rejoice in His goodness as we continue to let faith build in us, knowing that God is good and that good is on the way for us!

We have two options left to us:  One, because of our fear of disappointment, to not allow ourselves to hope for anything, and to maintain an even keel at all times in the name of “surrendering everything to God,” and by doing so live a life with no faith and no impact and no disappointment.  Two, to live such a radical life of faith and hope, that we are unwilling to let our own disappointments hinder us from hanging on to the goodness of God and of the promises that He has given to us!  I would rather be disappointed a thousand times and yet live with such great faith that mountains move, rather than live a life without faith, never tasting of disappointment again and leaving no mark on eternity whatsoever.